If I’m lying, I’m flying!
Carlos used to say; If I’m lying, I’m flying. He was trying to make me laugh and get me to put my guard down. I would be more open to his ideas and concepts. Savvy, wasn’t he?
Would you believe me if I told you coaching is not created equal? The word “coach” is grossly overused in our industry, and I would like to present how and why that is.
So, What is coaching?
The coaching relationship is a designed alliance in which both coach and participant collaborate actively and equally in meeting the client’s goals.
Imagine a relationship that is entirely focused upon you. Someone who listens to your dreams and aspirations and holds you accountable to them, helping you move beyond the limiting beliefs that bend you to the current conditions and circumstances. Coaching is a forward-facing approach!
I remember the first time I was exposed to this truth. I was baffled. All of my life, I thought coaching was telling people what to do! I thought coaching only related to the field of sports and fitness.
Having daughters in soccer for all their middle and high school careers, I saw it firsthand; I had a front-row seat to the mechanics of coaching.
As a Crossfit coach and personal trainer, I attempted to coach my clients through their health journey.
I primarily used the methodologies of coaching that I learned through my certifications. I thought I was ready. But something was always missing, and I could not grasp it.
My clients would do well for some time, plateau, and then fall off the wagon!
Man, that would eat at me. Annoying!
Here I was, being their biggest supporter. I thought “the secret sauce” was to be heavily vested in their success, and for a while, it was!
Sigh! Yet, they would revert to their old habitual behaviors.
Then these common expressions would follow;
If I’m lying, I’m flying!
- If I could only keep the weight off, ugh!
- If I could only pick up my groceries without throwing my back out!
- If I could only walk for a mile without feeling out of breath?
- If I could only fit into my clothes and feel good about myself!
- If I could only have more energy!
Have you said these words? Is it just me?
“If I could only___________” were the words I would often utter after what seemed to be a long battle between mindset and application. That was only if I could convince them not to give up or give in.
But, no matter how hard we worked and the milestones achieved, all efforts seemed futile.
You may be saying in your head, but If these problems didn’t exist, she would be out of a job, right? And you would be right! Although my clients could still meet their goals, it was not always sustainable.
And that raised the question, how can I better serve my client to sustain their lifestyle
without reverting to their old habits and continue to grow should they decide to do it on their own?
During this quest, I stumbled across the John Maxwell Team for the one answer. At first glance, I thought; this could be interesting. I originally signed up to polish my public speaking skills.
Little did I know what was waiting for me! I was mesmerized when my mentor Christian Simpson did a presentation on the true art of coaching. He had a person come up on stage who had never been able to juggle. I sat there mesmerized and watched him coach her to juggle. He began to ask her question after question as he listened carefully; all of this was unfolding right before me! I was on the edge of my seat!
She did it! I was stunned.
I could not believe my eyes. How did he do it? How did he know what to say? How’s this even possible? My curiosity increased! The guest sat down, and we all waited for him to explain what had transpired.
What he said next grabbed my attention;
“The answer always lies within the individual; they are just unaware!”
What!!!!
Can I say REVELATION? The penny dropped!
OMG, I experienced this phenomenon in the flesh. There is nothing more revealing! I saw it play out right before me, and it was both fascinating and exhilarating. That day I was convinced that I was doing it all wrong. My mind was racing; I thought, Rhaiza, think about the possibilities and what this could mean for the clients you will serve. Imagine the life people will live as a result of this! They say that you don’t know what you don’t know! And that statement is real! More accurate than I care to give it meaning.
I make no apologies when I say all coaching is not created equal; I mean it!
So I dare ask yourself these questions if you are currently in a coaching relationship.
- Am I being told what to do, directed, and guided by my current coach?
- Am I increasingly becoming more aware?
- Are they asking me better questions I cannot ask myself? The quality of your questions matters 😉!
- What are my results telling me about myself?
- Am I closing the gap between where I am now vs. where I want to be?
If I’m lying, I’m flying!
Coaching is one of the most significant investments you will ever make. Test me on this!
I’m looking forward to your findings! Please share them with me! Connect with me @Rhaiza Gutierrez on all social media platforms!
If you are curious about my coaching techniques and philosophies, schedule your complimentary
discovery call!
